Monday, December 7, 2009

When I hear the sound of the Black Bird's Cry.. I know I left in the nick of time

It's a snowy cold day in Colorado. I'm curled up on the couch reading and drinking tea.. all that's missing is a fire place and some violin music playing softly in the background...

Well I went back to PA from November 23-December 3 with my big brother and my bestest gal pal. I have often wondered as I look at my mountain view if Colorado is in the cards for me or if I'm just wishing and hoping its where I'm suppose to be. Now I am more certain then ever that running away from home was the right thing to do.

It was great to see my family and friends again, the familiar faces really warmed my heart and made me feel so blessed for those in my life. I was able to surprise my family on Thanksgiving and then again surprise all my old college friends and professors with a visit to campus a few days after the holiday. So fun! I enjoyed seeing my best friends and realizing that no matter where life takes you, you can always know that real friendships never die. When I hung out with my girls and of course Jeremy it was like I had never left home, it was wonderful! However, I did realize soon why leaving PA was a smart move for me.

Have I ever mentioned that I was offered my own TV station in Connellsville PA? Well I was offered this job.. in August.. and I turned it down immediately without hesitation because I was playing the mountains and of course nothing fazes me when I'm 9000 ft above elevation. Then a few days later I realized what the offer entailed.. a career (good pay, benefits, security, status, etc.) And I have often wondered if I turned out something good. While I was home however I just didn't feel like myself.. I was tense, anxious, participated in activities I gave up a long time ago, had no interest in making time for God. And as I hung out Pittsburgh and Butler I realized something.. if I was to take this job in PA I would never get to where I want to be.. a voice for those who suffer. Although this station job would give me authority, money, and security.. it would also give me a 9-5 office job, in small town PA, and I would not be as free or as alive as I am out in Colorado. I knew then and there I had made the right decisions.

As for the rest of my trip there was some great times and some not so great times. Seeing old familiar faces brought both joy and pain but such is life.. The one great thing was that my family and I were able to have a burial and memorial service for my little brother. We went on a small walk to one of his favorite hunting spots and buried him under a beautiful tree in the woods. It was a beautiful time to spend together and a time of reflection of not only Christopher but of ourselves as well. I also spent wayy to much time at Ricks.. and looking back I'm thoroughly embarrassed that I let old crazy anne out of the box.

But now I'm back in Colorado and so happy to see my mountains again! Its freezing cold and the snow is accumulating more and more everyday.. yay!! Its so beautiful ! I am also in the process of my first producing job.. a producer of non-profit commercials for a series entitled "Go Serve" I am so excited and nervous about this opportunity. God really does provide when you trust in him. No its not a full time TV station, but its what I love to do.. that is so much more important then money and job security. The hardest part of this job so far has been deciding my budget.. I really love what I do so much that I honestly could care less about the money. I know practically that is nonsense but I really do love working for free as long as I'm shooting and editing video!

I also just finished reading a book, Volunteer Revolution by Bill Hybels. Awesome! It was about why people volunteer, what it means to volunteer, and how communities need each other for our own abilities to contribute. I highly recommend it if you are a passionate community volunteer but especially if you aren't and you are curious about what it means to volunteer. It just has made me want to go out and spread the love! :)

I'm also just starting a new book, "When God Writes Your Love Story." So I hear a lot that I'm somewhat of a tease.. or heartbreaker.. mainly my big brother likes to point it out. This book was recommended to me and I decided to invest in someone's expert opinion of relationships with the opposite sex. While I was home I actually had a little crush on someone but I think they keep turning me down.. not sure. But really I am so content being single I don't want to think about dating. However, I often wonder if I am being called to singleness or not.. but I'm anxious to indulge in this book and perhaps it'll open my eyes to my heartbreak ways ;)

So this was long, and probably pointless but I thought I'd update it for the two people who may sometimes read this. Remember.. "Think of all the beauty still left around you and be happy." Anne Frank

Good Night & Good Luck