Monday, January 18, 2010

Mountains Beyond Mountains

Well if nothing else people I know I don't want to move back to Pennsylvania because it's never 60 degrees and sunny in the middle of January.. but in CO that's the norm I suppose :)

These past few weeks have been some of the hardest since I've moved to CO. For the first time since June I haven't had any "real" work to do. It's been really difficult for me to wake up knowing I don't have a contract job to go to today. For the first time I even almost regretted not taking the managers position at the television station in PA.. almost regretted is key. Sometimes in life, especially for me, I forget to look at the bigger picture and instead I look at other people's lives. It's silly really. I know I would never be happy in small town PA and that any job I took there would be out of the need of security rather then passion and drive to do the job. I've spent the last week crying and feeling sorry for myself.. what a loser you are Anne!

A few days ago I helped my friend Sarah paint her office. Up until the day I spent with Sarah I was furiously applying for jobs, researching grants and funding for independent filmmakers, and crying myself to sleep. Man.. who would have ever thought I was an emotional girl? :) Sarah is an amazing woman with amazing dreams. She had this dream when she was in school of using nutrition to help people health from illnesses. However, this isn't an easy profession to
bust into, You basically have to start your own practice and acquire your own clients. With this dream in mind Sarah set out meeting nutritionists taking steps to build her career. She had no luck. When she finally hit a wall of serious doubt about her dreams she walked away from them. But, with all things, God works for the good of those who love him. He opened an opportunity for her to meet another nutritionist who was a professional in the exact career Sarah wanted to pursue. Now, after two years, she is starting her own practice and attending grad school. Her journey really opened my heart and mind that my biggest dreams cannot be accomplished over night. And that I really have no reason to be upset that I'm not doing exactly what I think I should be doing. After all.. If you want to make God laugh tell him your plans. It's so true!

I met a producer/author/public speaker the other day who is starting a tv station in 36 states and it will run online. The purpose of the station is showcase work of female producers and highlight non-profit organizations. The station is also a partner with Samsung in releasing this new technology that can turn any quality video into HD! Well I sent her my resume for a job.. that of course was already being filled.. but the good news is she contacted me and told me how much she loved my work and wanted to keep in touch with me for future work opportunities. After some chatting I asked her if I could put my Nueva Esperanza documentary on her channel.. and she said yes! For the next six months my production will be shown and she has allowed me to tag contact information at the end. This is free awesome publicity. God is doing something great, I trust so much in his promise. There's gotta be someone out there who believes in funding and supporting social justice documentary productions! I believe.

The other day I saw a bald eagle in my backyard.. holy smokes! I was so thrilled and inspired. I know its just a bird.. but its so rare and beautiful it truly lifted my spirits. It also reminded me of my little brother Christopher Joel because his favorite animal was a bald eagle. It just gave me so much hope to see this bird and know that Christopher is in a better place and that I too will be ok.
So I went and volunteered at World Vision so I could know I was doing something to help those in Haiti. I took my girl Alyssa and we packed a lot of shoes for 8 hours.. and it was good! Poor Haiti. I was also able to hold a donation drive to buy medicine for the country and was thrilled when theMILL pulled through and raised a coupe hundred dollars. I am so pumped when people care. I love my generation because I really see that we want to volunteer and help other people. I get really ticked when I hear older people say we're lazy.. I mean there's a fair share but I believe people my age are looking for causes and reasons to get their hands dirty, work in community, and help make better the lives of those who are poor and hopeless. I read a facebook status tonight that said.. quote.. why should we help Haiti when they didn't come to our rescue during Katrina. Wow.. ignorance at its finest. But I'm glad for everyone else I hear that is praying, donating, and loving on Haiti right now. I hope someday you'll be able to go to that country and realize the beauty of it. The Haitian people are the most genuine loving people I have ever met. They have nothing.. seriously nothing.. and they are SO happy and caring. When I was there I learned so much about living, needing, and serving. I went there to help and instead they changed my life. Haiti has nothing and this restoration of their country won't be easy but this is truly what life is about. Community looking after community. Paul Farmer, founder of Partners in Health, a medical clinic in Port-au-Prince said.. " It should be enough to humbly serve the poor" and dude believe me it truly is! Mountains Beyond Mountains is a fabulous story of Paul Farmer's journey in Haiti and the history of Haiti if you're looking for a good read. Talk about pursuing dreams and believing that life is about using talents to better other's lives. He's a big inspiration to me.

I don't believe that all these natural disasters that have taken place in the last ten years are just coincidence. I really believe mother nature.. or my LORD Jesus.. [which ever you prefer] is telling us its time to end the B.S. going on in this world and help a brother out. Haiti has been a complete mess for years.. seriously more hopeless then you can imagine.. and it takes a 7.0 earthquake for people and governments to lend a helping hand. Maybe all of these disasters are to show us we really need each other.. we really don't need a lot of money, fancy cars, or material things.. we need only a few things : 1. love 2. community 3. Peace 4. Faith
I don't know about you.. but it seems the world is being rocked and if we don't change we're never going to make it out alive.

With that being said I spent a wonderful weekend in the mountains, loved it. Ran a whole lot. Again.. loved it!

I write novels with these blogs.. well I just want to make sure Karina has enough to read and hopefully she'll enjoy what I have to say more then fuss over my wrong punctuation and grammar. :) So with that being said.. go donate a dollar to Friends of Ft. Liberte or Partners in Health. A dollar goes so much further then you realize.

"We are called to speak for the weak, for the voiceless, for victims of our nation and for those it calls enemy, for no document from human hands can make these humans any less our brothers"-MLK

Monday, January 4, 2010

Joie de Vivre

I really don't write as much as I like .. why did I even start a blog?

I spent Christmas in the mountains with my brother and his girlfriends family. I sat by the fire, drank wine, listened to carols, and read the entire twilight series. I must have been a little dizzy from the high altitude that I actually read Twilight (because silly vampire romance doesn't do i
t for me) well not usually but I have to admit I fell in love with the books. So my apologies for laughing at everyone else I know that has read them... It really was a beautiful story of life, love, and struggle. I really enjoyed spending time with this family for the holidays although I was sad to not see my own family. I can't begin to explain the beauty of the snow covered mountains on Christmas day. I was born to see sights like that.

As for adventure, I'm learning how to snowboard! It has been a wild time and I've already dislocated my shoulder.. my new dear friend Nate has been generous enough to give me all the gear I need to look legit.. now if only I could master my mad skill! However, I am going to give myself the credit that I never thought I'd be able to snowboard down a mountain and actually be ok enough to do it a second or third time. I've even made it down the entire mountain without falling. Joie de Vivre was a term recently introduced to me by a distant cousin I have in Alaska. Its about loving and enjoying life, even the times when you fall face first into the snow. I may not be the best snowboarder and the little four year olds may pass me but I truly enjoy being able to participate in the activity. Besides being on top of a mountain in the snow is so worth the occasional fall.. it's a beautiful sight!

2009 was about healing from my little brother's death, celebrating my college graduation, learning about community and life in Haiti, Relationship building with my friends and my God at Covenant Heights Camp, and exploring this wonderful state of Colorado. I grew up a lot in 2009, learned a lot about myself and learned a lot about life. I realized what I cherished the most and what I truly wanted out of life. I learned how to relax, have fun, explore, love, and have peace of mind. Now in 2010 I really want to know what it is I've been made to do. Although video production is my passion.. helping others and traveling also has my heart and attention. I know I want to combine both and perhaps someday I will.. but for now if I'm going to figure out what it is God has for me. I have some opportunities coming up for job possibilities and I fear if I write about them then they won't happen :) but I am hopeful that God does have a plan and purpose for me.. why else would I ditch all my securities and move across the country? I'm starting to feel more at home in Colorado and at the same time I'm becoming kind of restless here. I often think about moving to Alaska.. I don't know why but I feel that I need some new adventure in my life. I recently read "When God Writes Your Love Story" and have since felt that I need to continue to embrace my singleness and my passions to continue to move around and share life with others. I know I'm not here to stay, at least I don't feel that way and I'm trying not to become attached to anyone so if I do leave it'll be easier. However I do cherish everyone in my life and everyone who has encouraged me to chase my dreams. I know 2010 will be a big year. And I want to glorify Christ for all he has done for me. So Happy New Year and I wish you the best in all that you pursue. And I urge you to chase your dreams and live for the moments that make you feel alive.